Shed and Unshed Tears
by Edesina
Summary: Life is a rollercoaster. Sometimes everything is alright, sometimes not. But when your choices affect someone else's life, what do you do? How can you pick the do what's right if every path leads to dead-end? Post series family drama
1. Mistakes we have committed

**Author:** Edesina  
>Beta: -<br>**Rating: **T to be safe. Maybe the rating shouldn't even be this high.

**Characters**: Vivio, Fate, Nanoha, OFC, Signum, Yuuno  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Angst, Romance, Drama, maybe little H/C…  
><strong>Summary: <strong>_Life is a rollercoaster. Sometimes everything is alright, sometimes not. But when your choices affect someone else's life, what do you do? How can you earn a lost trust or forgive someone? Or can you?_

**Disclaimer:** Not mine :(

**A/N**: This is an idea that I've been toying with for a while. I think this fandom suits perfectly and I can write my OTP ^^ Two birds with one fic. Actually 3 but I don't want to tell yet what the third bird is. I know that I shouldn't start another long story but the idea is just too awesome.

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><p><em><strong>Shed and Un-shed Tears<br>**  
><em>

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><p><em>Life is full of mistakes. No one is perfect, after all. Some mistakes are easier to forgive and some… cannot be forgiven. Whether they have realized or not, they had made a mistake. Or many, at this point it didn't matter anymore. The worst had happened: the trust was shattered in pieces.<em>

_Can you forgive someone who has lied to you? Can you forgive the one you love if she hurts you fatally? Will you try to stay together to protect the one who matters you the most - your child? Maybe that is a wise choice, maybe not…_

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><p><em>Prologue: Mistakes we have committed<em>

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><p>The first rays of morning slipped past Venetian blinds and revealed a blonde crying girl. Next to her was half-asleep woman who looked confused. <em>Whether touch her or not. <em>

"Fate…" the woman murmured. Self-loathe and sadness dimmed her blue eyes. Fate sniffed and raised her head a little. Her eyes were redder than usual because she had been crying.

"Can we pretend that that never happened?" Fate begged and swallowed hard before letting her tears flow freely again. The other woman caught only a handful of words between sobs. "I… I shouldn't… I mean, Nanoha… And, Vivio too."

_It was terrible mistake. The worst I had made ever. It was…_

The other woman didn't say anything but guilt was written all over her face. She knew that Fate had Nanoha and they were supposed to just have fun evening in the bar. Nanoha hated those bars so she stayed always home with seven year old Vivio. They didn't have feelings for each other so why on earth had they woken up naked in the bed? It meant only one thing and they both knew it.

Fake was fully awake in seconds. The same nightmare kept playing in front of her eyes night after night. Confession was out of question, Nanoha wouldn't understand and besides Fate wasn't sure what _had_ happened. She didn't have really urgent reason to tell Nanoha about that night especially because Fate wasn't going to repeat it. Still, three years and guilt and regret hadn't disappeared.

Nanoha wouldn't let her out ever again if she told her. The brunette was overly jealous which caused headache to Fate. Who couldn't Nanoha trust her? She wasn't really a party-popper but when she was in bar with a bunch of friends, she didn't want to answer calls or text messages every second minute.

Still, Fate knew she should finally tell Nanoha. Sighing she rose up. Clock wasn't even seven and Nanoha was asleep. She could tell her after morning practice.

…_To cheat the woman I love._

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><p>The alarm clock showed it was nine o'clock on a Saturday morning. Nanoha sighed. She was in her bed, alone. Fate had obviously left for morning practice. Sometimes Nanoha wondered if Fate cared about her but then she remembered the blonde's words:<p>

"I have to be strong in order to protect you and Vivio, Nanoha-chan."

Nanoha wondered if she and Fate should talk a bit. Between them was a great wall of silence. It hasn't been there before and Nanoha didn't remember when she noticed the secrecy between them for the first time. Had that black hole that gnawed their bong slowly been there from the beginning? Or when Yuuno had confessed his feelings to her and asked her to leave Fate for him?

_It was terrible mistake. The worst I had made ever. It was…_

Should she ask Yuuno or Hayate to take care of Vivio this night? Somehow she doubted that it'd be better for the little girl. That way they could speak more freely, they didn't have to worry about Vivio.

'_Wait, it's not like we're going to shout,'_ Nanoha stopped her thoughts before they went nightmarish. Still small voice, the voice that always told the truth, snorted. _'Yeah, keep dreaming.'_

Nanoha tried to ignore her fears but she still called Yuuno and asked him to come over. Yuuno was her most trusted friend who would help. Nanoha turned to Yuuno when she needed help because, she was shocked to realize this, Fate didn't seem to care at all. What if Yuuno was right? What if she and Fate were better friends than lovers?

No, that couldn't be it. She should trust Fate a little more.

…_To marry a girl who cannot be trusted._

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><p><strong>AN2**: So, any readers?


	2. Tension and Distrust

**A/N**: Okay, the story begins now. Ready? It'll be mainly Vivio's PoV. I hope I have managed to keep the text quite simple yet Vivio notices many things.

Thanks for reviewing. I think this chapter explains a bit (and leaves dozens of new questions ^^) It's quite short but right now I had to struggle with it. (Damn Nanoha does it on purpose)

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><p><em>Tension and Distrust<em>

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><p>Vivio opened her eyes and the comfortable silence greeted her. She wasn't worried at all because the house was empty. Fate-mama and Nanoha-mama were just outside. Besides she was already a big girl, she had turned ten not so long ago. A quick glance revealed that it was already 9.30 in the morning so her parents should be back soon. Fate-mama was practicing as usual. Vivio knew that Fate wanted to protect her and Nanoha because she loved her family.<p>

Unknown to her parents, Vivio knew about Fate's sister Alicia who had died. Vivio also knew that Fate-mama's childhood had been horrible because she talked about it when she had nightmares. Not even Nanoha-mama knew that Fate had nightmares really often, more often than Vivio. The girl had listened to her mother's cries many times when they all had slept in one bed.

Vivio got up and ran to kitchen enthusiastically. If she was quick she could brew coffee to Fate and Nanoha and then her mothers would hug her and smile. Especially Fate-mama who had been down lately but who didn't tell what was wrong.

Fate was strong but Vivio couldn't understand why she didn't say anything about her problems. She had said that Vivio shouldn't keep her problems inside and yet Fate-mama didn't follow her own advice. Instead she smiled gently while her eyes were sad.

Every day Fate-mama's eyes were a little sadder, her pain increased but she didn't say a word. She endured it and smiled when someone was looking. Erio and Caro had noticed the same, Vivio had asked them once.

Today Fate-mama was smiling, Vivio noted silently. She talked to Nanoha-mama quietly when they walked in the kitchen. Her red eyes lit when she saw that Vivio had brewed coffee.

"Morning, Vivio. I see you saved my day, dear," she said and kneeled down to kiss Vivio's forehead. Fate wasn't able to survive if she didn't drink at least five or six cups of coffee in a day.

"Morning, Fate-mama, morning Nanoha-mama," Vivio said happily. She had placed a bottle of strawberry jam on the table so they could eat bread for breakfast. Nanoha sat next to her but Fate just leaned on the kitchen table.

They ate in silence – in other words Vivio and Nanoha ate jam and toasts while Fate drank two cups of coffee. When Vivio thought back, she remembered only a couple of times when Fate had eaten breakfast with them.

"Say, Vivio, would you like to visit Yuuno today?" Vivio looked at Nanoha and then Fate, who looked surprised, and nodded. Last time she had seen Yuuno was almost a month ago and she missed the man who told her always exciting stories about her both mothers.

"Ah, Nanoha, do you mind if I don't come? Mother called me today and asked to come over. She has something important…" Fate's voice trailed off.

"Really? You didn't mention that earlier," Nanoha's eyes narrowed slightly.

"Sorry, I forgot. She called me early today. I promised to have lunch with her," the blonde woman said sheepishly and Nanoha's expression softened.

"Okay, say hello to Lindy. Shall we go, Vivio?"

"Yes," Vivio agreed happily and ran to the hall where she put a jacket and waited impatiently her mother. She was just going returning to ask when Nanoha was coming but an instinct commanded her to peek in the kitchen first.

"We really have to talk, Fate," Nanoha whispered dangerously, blue eyes were full of freezing rage. She stood mere inches away from Fate who looked quite scared. Nanoha was scary when she was angry so Vivio quickly sneaked back to the entrance and swallowed.

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><p>Fate decided to walk instead of flying. She grabbed an old Discman with her and looked at the mirror of the hall. Hopefully her dress wasn't too informal… heck, she was going to see her mother so a white shirt and black trousers were good enough. And she was going to jog the distance anyway.<p>

The day was beautiful and Fate smiled. She knew that she shouldn't enjoy when her situation was what it was. When Nanoha was mad at her, Fate wasn't able to enjoy small simplicities like sunshine and a cup of coffee in a peaceful and quiet morning.

She hadn't noticed that she was already in front of Lindy's house, her body had moved on its own and Fate had no idea what route she had used. Maybe she had jogged through the park? Dismissing her thoughts she knocked the door.

"Hello Fate," Lindy greeted happily. She had opened almost the time Fate had knocked, Fate knew that her mother had been watching out of the window so she'd see her immediately.

"Hello mother." Fate stepped inside and took her shoes off. She put them between her mother's walking shoes and the door, it was a spot reserved for her shoes only.

"So, how are things with Erika?" Lindy asked without waiting a second.

"Mom! Don't say it like we're dating or something," Fate grumbled.

"What? I want to know. I'm your mother after all." The blonde looked away. She didn't want to talk about Erika with her mom.  
><em>Especially <em>with her mom.

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><p>"Good night, Vivio-chan," Nanoha wished and Fate smiled behind the Instructor. She didn't say anything but her eyes told the story. Because Fate-mama was often quiet Vivio had learned to read her eyes. Now those red eyes reflected worry over something.<p>

"Good night Nanoha-mama, Fate-mama," the little girl said quietly and her mothers turned the lights off.

Vivio kept her eyes open, willed the sleep to stay away. Something was going to happen between her mothers and she wanted to know what. The tension had been horribly strong the whole day, even stronger than usual. It was something that had appeared only a while ago. Vivio knew that it was related to auntie Signum, auntie Hayate and uncle Yuuno. Maybe even Vita, Caro and Erio were part of it.

She felt like she had only a calm second before thunderstorm, the whisper before an explosive avalanche.

When Vivio was sure that she _should _be asleep, she slipped out of her bed and muffled her blanked so it looked like she was still sleeping and to make the figure girly, she put her biggest doll in her place. Their hair colors matched quite well. Then she sneaked to the door. She stopped only to put socks so her parents couldn't hear her steps.

She listened carefully to hear any sounds and walked to the stairs hiding just behind the corner. When she was sure that no one was at the end of stairs she got on fours and quickly looked if she was right.

The stairs was empty and she rushed down. Nanoha and Fate should be in the living room, sitting in front of fireplace. It was comfortable place and Vivio had seen them there many times. They talked and sipped the contents of their glasses. Nanoha drank juices, creamy liqueurs or beer. Fate drank wine, rum with cola, or other cocktails.

Vivio had spent many evenings watching her parents when they talked together about their past or future. She had been curious and done a bit research on those weird drinks when her parents had been away. Then she had asked Fate who understood her better. Nanoha-mama just said that alcohols were dangerous but Fate-mama had told her more, taught her the basics of mixing cocktails and wine sampling. Of course she didn't let Vivio to drink them but taste a drop or two. When the girl's questions were answered Vivio hadn't even looked at the alcohol stash in the living room. Those terrible tasting drinks weren't for her.

"So, the story in nutshell: I'm not trustworthy? Care to tell me why?" Fate asked quietly. She sat on the couch at the end of the living room. Nanoha stood near the fireplace and Vivio hid in the shadows better.

"I need to explain why? Tell me, Fate, _when_ will you grow up and take some responsibility? _We_ have a daughter yet you're never there for her. When was the last time you walked her to school or home? I know you sneak away if you promise to take her there," Nanoha said furiously.

"I…" Fate was lost in words. What Nanoha said was partially true, she never walked Vivio to school but… Nanoha was too strict. Vivio had friends she met on her way to school every day.

"You can't say anything because it's true, right? Tell me, what's Vivio's favourite color? When was the last school trip? Do you know how well she does in the school? You don't know, do you?"

"You're wrong. I do care about her," Fate replied quietly - yet she didn't face Nanoha whose words were painful.

"I'm not saying that you don't but you can't raise her!"

"Quiet," Fate hissed. "Vivio is upstairs."

"So _now_ you care about her? So you think I don't know what happened between you and Signum? Why didn't you think about Vivio before you chose her over me?" Vivio saw tears falling down on Nanoha's cheeks and she moved a little to see both of her mothers at the same time. Fate's face was empty but pale.

"How Signum affects to my ability to be mother to Vivio?" Fate said after a while.

"You don't deny it? You're the worst! You've been cheating on me the whole time!" the blown-haired mage accused. Her voice trembled. Fate's eyes widened when she realized what she had just revealed. "Just move together with her already and don't pretend that you love me!"

"I haven't! Nanoha, I love you, I truly love you," Fate said but she looked defeated.

"I think we should live alone for a while." Vivio heard the song of breaking glass. She didn't react to the revelations, just watched quietly and saw the look of utter horror on Fate's face.

"We-what?"

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><p><strong>AN2**: Hah, the bomb is dropped. For those who wondered who is Erika, she's my OC who will be introduced in the next chapter. I just don't like revealing everything right away. Again, reviews would be nice. Also I can't update really quickly, I have RL and few other unfinished stories as well but I do my best.


	3. Emotional crisis

**A/N**: Again, Erika appears in this chapter. I bet you all want to know who and what she is ^^ But I won't reveal her role yet. *evil laugh* Okay, you'll know in the next chapter.

Thank you for reviewing, this time I try to answer to them all. Sorry for taking so long but RL tried to run over me in a form of school.

**Sammie-Chan98**, I wonder about that that too. Hopefully not too well as I'm not a fan of sugar and fairies-stories.

**XxLinhxX**, poor Vivio indeed. Though I went easy on her. Originally Fate or Nanoha would have brought someone home during the time they were still together and on the next day the other one would have taken her away without an explanation. ^^ I think Nanoha and Fate's relationship will evolve even more during the story although it's not my focus point in the fic...

**Ryufu**, Those first impressions were nice to hear. I hope Nanoha will come to her senses ^^ You didn't have to wait for too long either, I guess.

**Asuka47**, here's the update. I agree with you, Fate thinks way too much. Though since she keeps other secrets from Nanoha, I guess one won't really matter.

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><p><em>Emotional crisis<em>

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><p>Fate let her body move on its own. Her mind was completely blank. Live alone? Live without Nanoha and Vivio? How the hell could she do that? Fate somehow knew that she should cry but she was too shocked, empty, to do that.<p>

Nanoha was still looking at her, waiting her response. Fate wanted to know if Nanoha truly meant it, living alone would be were different. For both of them. Yet she couldn't even face Nanoha. Her fingers just pulled her cell phone and dialed the only number she had committed to memory, save Nanoha's.

"_What's wrong?_"

"I think I need a drink or two. Wanna accompany me?" Fate listened to her voice. She wasn't really talking, it had to be a copycat… She could never be so… calm, almost steely emotionless. Just like when Precia… _'No, stop it! Stop it!'_

"_You won't go to a bar, Fate. I forbid it."_

"Why not? I think I'm old enough to decide what to do, thank you very much," Fate replied, her voice couldn't hide her annoyance. She noticed how Nanoha's eyes filled with sadness but she didn't care. It was just a blurry reflection, she lied to herself.

"_Because I say so."_

Fate snorted. She really needed a raw triple-vodka at least.

"_So how long do you need?"_

"Huh, you're coming?"

"_Hell no, but sounds like you're going to stay over."_

"Well, yeah, kinda, but…" Fate blushed. Maybe calling Erika hadn't been one of her brightest ideas. Nanoha was listening and she was probably ready to explode.

"_No buts idiot. I give you fifteen minutes and you better be ready then. Oh, and don't even think of sneaking in a bar."_

"What are you, a mind-reader?" Fate whined. She absolutely hated Erika when the woman read her mind easily. Was she really _that_ open?

"_Of course not. Fifteen minutes, Fate. See ya soon."_

"Ah, sure," Fate agreed weakly, she had no options. Besides going with the flow was much easier than thinking. She stared out of window because she couldn't face Nanoha, see the sorrow in her eyes, or even worse, not to see it.

"You called her, didn't you?" Nanoha asked, the voice was barely a whisper. She didn't say who but Fate knew it anyway. Nanoha thought that she had called Signum. Damn, she should have told Nanoha about that catastrophe. Telling about it now would be useless, they were both quite edgy and confused. The last thing Fate wanted to do was add more to the chaos.

"I didn't."

"Then who?" Nanoha almost begged to know, Fate even turned to face her. She swallowed, then licked her lips. She felt the surreal feeling again, she was two steps out of her body, or the shell the went by name 'Fate'.

"I…" Fate struggled to find the required words. Why was it so hard? She trusted Nanoha more than anyone. The brunette would stay silent… probably. That little doubt locked her tongue. Instead she shook her head.

"I see." Fate looked at her bag. She hadn't packed… Or had she? She had no memories of what she had done, only Nanoha's words were in her mind.

Nanoha didn't move when she walked past the brunette, she looked only sad, disappointed.

"Nanoha?" the girl didn't reply. "Let's live apart for a while. I think it'll be good for us."

"Yes…"

"I love you." With that said Fate walked downstairs. No matter how she wished, Nanoha didn't stop her. Was this the end? No, she wouldn't allow that.

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><p>-x-<p>

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><p>The wind was chilly and under other circumstances Fate would have enjoyed the refreshing smell of it. She sat on a cement fence and dropped her bag on the ground. That was all she had taken, a pair of shirts, her uniform and jeans. She had only a t-shirt on. Her jacket was next to her but she since she wasn't cold, she didn't bother putting it on.<p>

"Sorry I'm late," familiar voice greeted. Fate looked to her right, into Erika's hazel brown eyes. Fate had been so drown in her thoughts that she hadn't heard the woman nor her car.

"Not that I mind," Fate muttered. Erika had seen the grumpy side of her many times so she didn't bother hiding her annoyance. Without Erika and her damn control over her, the blonde woman would be getting so drunk that she didn't remember who she was.

"Obviously," Erika commented dryly and grabbed Fate's bag and walked to her car. "Don't you have a jacket?"

As an answer Fate showed her dark jacket and realized how idiotic she was. The other woman had a bad habit of making her see her actions in a different light. It was cold and she hadn't put her jacket on… Erika had her trademark I'm-not-amused-by-your-stupidity look though she wasn't too serious. If she was, Fate's neighbours would know it. Erika was nice unless she was annoyed. When she was, hell froze and even the devil would hide.

"Anyway jump in before you turn into ice," Erika half-joked. Fate obliged but stole a quick glance of the second window in the second floor. It was her and Nanoha's room. She saw a shade but it was too dark to see face, or what she wanted to see: eyes.

The lamp inside the car had been fixed, it had broke last week, and Fate stared Erika for seconds. Short, spiky, violet hair… Violet, not black or auburn, not even the light grayish blue which was the original colour.

"You have changed your hairstyle _again_."

"Well, yes, but violet doesn't go well with my skin, I'm afraid," Erika laughed. In the last month her hair had been an interesting mixture of curly orange and golden strands that seemed to change shade calmly. "So I guess I have to change the colour again."

Fate sighed. Erika looked really cute. "Are there any colours you haven't tried yet?"

"Green and pink together…" Fate shivered, not only because the coldness had finally caught her, and Erika grinned. "But my reaction was just like yours. I think I want to see the original colour again before I forget what it looks like. Are you cold?"

"Not really," Fate mumbled feeling a little embarrassed. Erika would scold her if she admitted the truth. Well, probably the violet haired woman was going to do that anyway.

"Fate, what have I said about lies?" Erika turned the heating system on and let the subject drop and the conversation died. She was worried about Fate because she knew the blonde woman well. No matter how tough she acted, Fate was quite fragile. Erika sped up, breaking few restrictions of speed was the last of her concerns. She didn't want to be in the car when Fate broke down, which was only a matter of time. Feeling cold was one of the first symptoms.

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><p>-x-<p>

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><p>She parked the car and let trembling Fate quickly inside. She could get Fate's things later, then have a conversation with Nanoha. As much as she detested the fact, her job was to deal with the brunette because letting Fate near Nanoha in her current state was something she dreaded.<p>

The violet haired woman helped Fate on the sofa and walked to the kitchen. A blanket and a bottle of cognac were waiting for her on the table. She had had time to prepare herself. All that was left was brewing the tea.

"Is there always this cold?" Fate asked. She was shivering and Erika wrapped the blanket around her. Without a warning Fate broke in tears.

"What…am I… going to…do?" the blonde asked between sobs. Erika pulled her to a hug and let her cry. She knew that Fate needed it.

"Why doesn't she love me?" Fate went on with her soliloquy and Erika listened. They were interrupted by the whistling teapot.

"Sounds like the tea is ready. Wouldn't you come to the kitchen with me?"

"Okay," Fate agreed sheepishly, which confused Erika. Last time Fate had had an emotional crisis (when she was worried that she wasn't good mother to Vivio) she had been angry, not like pregnant woman with mood-swings. The violet haired woman hadn't decided which Fate was worse.

Fate walked to the kitchen and Erika followed her making sure that she didn't walk into walls or something. Luckily they got into the kitchen without accidents. Erika poured some tea for both of them and gave Fate also a glass of cognac. The blonde's eyes were still moist and slightly more reddish than usual. Still she had her mask on; her face was completely void of any emotions. Erika didn't mind this, it was just Fate's self-defense mechanism. Erika smiled gently and let Fate drink her tea.

Only when Fate yawned, she spoke up. "Go to sleep, Fate. You look like a zombie," she ordered softly.

"Yes, mother," Fate giggled which turned to another yawn. She got up and walked to the door when she turned around. She smirked mischievously. "Sleep with me?"

"What are you, four?" Erika mocked playfully.

"Please?" Fate pleaded, she tilted her head slightly down and looked Erika trough her eyelashes.

"Fine, whatever," Erika muttered and looked to her right. Fate seemed happy, as if she had won. Erika hid her smile and let Fate think that Erika had agreed because Fate looked quite venerable, not because Fate needed safety tonight.

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><p>-x-<p>

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><p>Erika sighed and dialed the number she had committed to memory. She licked her dry lips, but there was no going back. She had to do this now when Fate was asleep. Fate had agreed to this but Erika suspected that the blonde stand behind her words later.<p>

"_Hello?" _

"Am I speaking to Nanoha Takamachi?"

"_Yes, you are." _

"Good. My name is Erika Kalda. I have important matters I would like to discuss with you. May I interest you with a cup of coffee at the Four-leaf Clover?" Erika knew that giving her family name was quite risky as Kalda was rare surname. However, she assumed that Nanoha – or Commander Hayate – would mobilize a small unit if she stayed anonymous.

"_What matters?" _Nanoha sounded annoyed which suited fine. If annoyance caused Nanoha to overlook a fact or two or, with any luck, forget her name…

"Thehee, today at five p.m… Don't take Vivio with you," Erika ordered. What she was going to say wasn't something a ten-year-old girl should hear. She ended the call knowing that Nanoha would come if she was like Fate had described her. Well, if she didn't come, Fate would have to do this.

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><p><strong>AN2:** This chapter doesn't have Vivio's pov because I had to introduce Erika to you.


	4. Secrecy runs in the Family

**XxLinhxX**: No Erika doesn't want to be recognized. I won't reveal the reason in this chapter but you'll find out something interesting, I hope.

**BunnyxGilr**: Nice to hear that you want to find out where this story is heading although Fate is annoying. I'm sorry about that but she has to be.

**A/N:** I cut this chapter because I honestly don't have any idea how long this would have become. It's not even near where I'd like it to be but at least I was able to put Vivio part here. My about 10-year old Vivio is *a little* different than in canon. Still, I hope you like her ^^

_::text here::_ - telepathy/familiar talking

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><p><strong>Secrecy runs in the Family<strong>

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><p>Vivio stared the lightly grayish but still sunny world behind the window. Fate-mama had been sitting on the fence last night and then a dark car had driven there and taken her away. Vivio had seen the other woman. She had seen her many times earlier. Her name was Erika and she was a friend of Fate. Erika was nice, although a little scary. Her dark eyes seemed to see everything, she knew everything. Vivio had asked a lot of things and she had known answer to everything.<p>

Erika also sung well. Her songs sounded weird but beautiful. The words were soft, full of vowels. However Erika never spoke that language, not even Vivio had asked. The little girl had seen it written only once, in a cookbook. Vivio remembered only one word,_ lõhe_, because it had seemed funny. The thing over 'o' was funny, which was good reason to like the language.

Nanoha-mama had said that Fate had left to another world for a business trip but Vivio knew it was a lie. Fate always told her in advance and asked what she would like to get as a souvenir. Vivio didn't know why or where Fate-mama had left but she intended to find out.

"Shall we go, Kira-kun?" she asked her best friend, a warm orange and caramel brown striped cat-familiar who had appeared few months ago in her room just like that. It was a secret, Fate and Nanoha had thought that he was an ordinary kitten and let her keep it. Vivio listened to his answer and smiled a little. Kira would be able to track Fate-mama easily.

_::So you want to find mother? That's not even a challenge::_ Kira called Fate mother and Nanoha mama unless he used their real names. His way of talking had already affected Vivio although she tried to remember to add always mama after her morhers' names. And she was afraid that she might slip to using mama and mother, too.

_::Yes. Let's take some candy with us::_ Vivio suggested and grabbed a jacket made of jeans-fabric.

_::Why?::_

_::Because then mama will think that we go to park::_ Vivio explained and mentally slapped herself. She had used mama again. _::Kira-kun, your way of speaking is affecting me. What if I get caught?::_

_::Well, forgive me, little Fate::_ the cat replied dryly. He had noticed the similarity between mother and daughter. They acted often in the same way, Kira knew. He was just a cat so Fate lowered her guard around him more easily. No doubt that Vivio had learned the secrecy from Fate.

Vivio ran downstairs going into her innocent girl mode. Nanoha was in the kitchen and cooked dinner.

"Nanoha-mama, Kira-kun said that he wants to go to the park. Can we?" Vivio prayed that Nanoha would let her, mama was really strict. Fate would have let her… Sometimes Vivio wondered why mama didn't trust her at all. She was big girl, she could take care of herself. Maybe Nanoha would trust her more if she quitted acting like a child.

Nanoha stayed silent for a long time and Vivio was sure that she was going to say no. Vivio frowned and looked as sad as possible.

"Be sure to come home for dinner. Uncle Yuuno will eat dinner with us tonight. And take your cell phone with you," Nanoha ordered and Vivio's face lit up. Kira-kun laughed in her mind but Vivio ignored him, as well as his comment.

_::She's gonna be angry as hell when she finds out that you're two-faced:: _Vivio decided that she and Kira would have a talk about proper language.

"Yes~" Vivio said happily and ran to the door. Kira followed her and they ran towards the park until Vivio was sure that Nanoha wouldn't see her anymore. Having a strict mother was really troublesome sometimes.

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><p>-x-<p>

* * *

><p>'<em>Will she disappear just like Fate?'<em> Nanoha thought as she watched Vivio, who was running towards the park. She wasn't blind or stupid so she knew that Vivio was hiding a lot of things. The girl wouldn't open up and Nanoha didn't press the matter. That would just make Vivio to grow even more secretive. The little blonde was just like Fate in many ways. Nanoha had noticed the increase in Vivio's magical aura so the little girl was probably practicing her new magic secretively. Vivio was still too green to notice magical auras, let alone to hide hers.

Although Nanoha was often called as genius in forms of magic, people forgot Fate. The blonde had been able to create own familiar at the age of 8, and she was really good with lightning which was the most difficult element to control. Nanoha's own element, spirit, was neither easy nor difficult. Water and earth were easier, fire was about the same and lightning and wind were the most difficult ones. Elements had temperament and one had to learn how to "speak" to the element. True, Fate's mother, Precia had been also talented in lightning magic but one couldn't inherit the control of magic.

'_Needless to say, I was jealous of her skills. To my defense, I was 9 when and she had changed a lot. When we fought against each other, she was unsure and clearly carrying heavy burden. After the Precia incident she was cold. I think she saw us her enemies and she was misjudged. She truly believed that Lost Logia would have changed Precia to the way she had been – with Alicia. Fate never talks about that time but I think she hated the whole universe for being so unfair. At the same time she hated herself for being so naïve, idealistic.'_

Vivio was changing, growing up too fast. Both Nanoha and Fate had worked so hard in order to let her grow up in a peaceful environment. It was the best gift they could give after having lived in the adult world since the incident with Precia. Nanoha turned around to face a large mirror, Vivio had already disappeared, and eyed her reflection.

"So how should I dress up for tonight? Should I try to impress Yuuno's new date or not? Shall I be that evil, hmm?" Nanoha spoke gently to her reflection.

She and Yuuno had a tendency to try and impress the other's new date. It was a game they enjoyed, even more after Nanoha revealed that she was dating a girl. Once Yuuno lied that he had three girls at the same time. He wasn't a player but when he dressed well, he really was the prince charming. Afterwards they would laugh together and even Fate had been subjected to the game. Yuuno had been really evil that night, and mentioned a couple of Nanoha's ex-boy-and girlfriends.

Nanoha crawled under the bed, the lipstick was still out of her reach. What a pain. She wasn't really a friend of makeup but Yuuno and his brand-new girlfriend were coming for a dinner so she had to look at least decent.

She hated the danger zone as she called the space under the was full of useless things. She closed her eyes and reached for a round thing. It wasn't the lipstick, but maybe a rope? It was hidden between the boxes where they kept extra duvets and pillows. It wasn't left by Nanoha, maybe Vivio's? The girl had been interested in ropes and knots when she had wanted to become a pirate. Luckily Vivio had changed her mind.

The rope was made of smooth leather. Nanoha's blue eyes widened as she realized _why_ it was hidden. Nanoha had tried to forget, it was something horrible, something she could never accept. She thought that she had thrown this thing away long ago. Besides _that_ incident happened before they had moved together. Why had Fate hidden it in their room?

"_Here," Fate held a dark brown leather whip in front of her face. Nanoha flinched away, the thing seemed dangerous. Black leather shone in the moonlight, and somehow the whole scene seemed to be taken from a horror movie. Fate stood in front of the large window and waited. _

"_Why would I need such a horrible thing?" Nanoha whispered, her face was suddenly as pale as the moon which shone behind Fate. _

"_I want you to use it… on me," the hesitation between the last words didn't go unnoticed. Nanoha stepped back and hid her arms behind her back._

"_No," she said sternly and looked at her girlfriend's eyes. Fate looked disappointed, fragile and unsure. The combination scared the hell out of Nanoha. Although Nanoha had seen a lot of horrible things, this was the worst this far. Her stomach twisted in agreement. _

"_But…"_

"_I won't ever hurt you Fate-chan!" She shouted looking away and felt tears burning in her eyes. Why Fate asked such a thing? She couldn't look at Fate, one look was more than enough. All she wanted was to forget it. The emptiness in Fate's eyes when she had said no._

Nanoha walked to kitchen and threw the whip in the trash can. She'd have to get rid of that thing immediately. Kitchen was lighter so little rust-coloured parts of the whip hadn't gone unnoticed. She had to talk with Fate soon. No, wait! Fate had cheated her with another woman. There's no way she could start worrying over such a little thing as whip right now.

First she had to get Fate back. The chirping sound that reminded of banshee cut her thoughts. She rushed to the phone. Maybe having a horrible ringtone, so that they'd have to answer phone quickly, wasn't so bright idea…

"Hello?" Nanoha answered hoping that Fate called her, which annoyed her to no end.

"_Am I speaking to Nanoha Takamachi?"_

"Yes, you are." The mage was confused, she didn't recognize the voice nor had any idea why unknown person would call her.

"_Good. My name is Erika Kalda. I have important matters I'd like to discuss with you. May I interest you with a cup of coffee at the Foul-leaf Clover?"_

"What matters?" Nanoha frowned. She didn't remember a woman, and the foreign name like Kalda was rare.

"_Thehee, today at five p.m… Don't take Vivio with you."_

"Wait!" Nanoha said but too late, the line was already dead. Although Nanoha wasn't really a nobody - she had gained some fame during her years In TSAB – not many people knew about Vivio. She bit her lip wondering if she should call Fa- no, Hayate. This woman could be trouble.

* * *

><p>-x-<p>

* * *

><p>Nanoha's glance caught every little detail around the Four-leaf Clover. Erio and Caro were in their positions; the boy was skating barely few meters away and the dragonmage was on a roof within eyesight. Teana was hiding somewhere in the distance and Subaru sat by the window inside the café. She had been there a while and would watch over Nanoha. The window reflected more than enough.<p>

Customers inside didn't look suspicious in general. Nanoha saw few gothic girls but she doubt that her companion would be one of them. Kalda had sounded adult.

"Shall we go inside, miss Takamachi?" A voice came behind her and Nanoha turned quickly around. How she could have not sensed the woman? She hadn't heard a thing and felt the presence of a mage even less.

"Miss Kalda, I assume?" Nanoha managed to breathe out. Her heart was pounding like crazy.

"That's correct. So, shall we?" Kalda smiled and walked towards the door without glancing back. Nanoha counted to ten in order to gain control of her emotions. The woman had turned her back to her! Nanoha followed and eyed the woman's back maliciously. No one surprised her, at least not many times. She hated surprises as they were dangerous in the battlefield.

Kalda wasn't particularly tall or short. Her hair was violet, it was an unusual colour although her clothing was simple. A grey blouse - the same colour as rain clouds – and a black skirt. It was warm day so she had no jacket and, of course, no weapons to show.

They remained quiet until a waiter had taken their orders. Mineral water and chicken caesar salad for Kalda and a cup of coffee and cake for Nanoha.

"So why did you call me?" Nanoha began after a while.

"Maybe I wanted to see you myself," the woman answered smiling a little. Nanoha was just going to ask why when the waiter brought their orders. Kalda lifted utensils but quickly lowered them.

"Did you know that it's not nice to eat when someone is pointing a gun at you? So, is it too much to ask if officer Lanster would not target me while I'm eating?"

"Eh?" Nanoha blinked and stole a quick look at the direction where she knew Teana was hiding.

"I knew it," Kalda muttered dryly and Nanoha blushed. "It's elementary, really. You and she are working under commander Yagami. She's a sharpshooter working under Fate so she'd be a logical choice," the woman continued calmly.

"I don't know what you mean," Nanoha replied stiffly.

"I would have done the same, however, a commander shouldn't give away the sharpshooter's location to the enemy. Or any information regarding his or her underlings."

"What?" Nanoha asked a way harsher than she had indented to. Kalda smiled and turned her attention to the salad. Nanoha used this time to think a way out. Obviously this was not a trap. Kalda wouldn't have told her that she knew about Teana unless… Unless she wanted Nanoha to check up on her. God, the woman was annoying. She seemed to be at least one step ahead.

"So… how do you know about her?"

"I can't answer to that," the woman replied and stared Subaru's back now. Nanoha gulped. Did Kalda know about Subaru too?

"Why?"

"Classified information," the woman said happily and Nanoha was ready to strangle her. She was worried about her underlings and this woman was fooling around.

"How much you know us then?" Nanoha tried again.

Kalda answered after a while. "Well, let's just say that I know who are your agents and where they are currently."

* * *

><p>-x-<p>

* * *

><p>Hayate stared the clock. Nanoha should have reported in already and shed a light to the mysterious woman. Her staff was still investigating. Surprisingly there were no records of someone named Kalda so the woman might have changed her name.<p>

"Hayate, I brought someone suspicious."

For a moment everyone inside the room froze. Hayate watched the woman curiously, Signum was stoic as ever but Fate… Nanoha met the red eyes for a second. Fate was horrified, almost in panic. It was something Nanoha hadn't seen ever. Not even when Fate had been undergoing her trial over ten years ago.

"Erika, why are you here?"

"Well, hello to you too, Fate. Your girlfriend didn't like me." The woman grinned as if the whole mess was just humouring her. "And secondly, I thought that you could give me a ride if I came here."

"It's your own fault so no," Fate joked.

Hayate knew that she was seeing something that didn't happen very often. She didn't know exactly what was happening but it'd become interesting, she was sure of it. Nanoha was fuming, Teana and Subaru looked confused. Hayate should scold them for that later, and the woman they brought in was amused. Her hands were cuffed, so Hayate guessed that it was the woman Nanoha met in the Irish café.

"You know her?" Signum asked quietly to break the silence. Fate nodded. She looked a little nervous, maybe she was hiding something?

"So, miss…?" Hayate started calmly, committing every single thing about the woman's appearance to memory. She maybe 30, not a lot younger because then she wouldn't have such confidence but not much older either. Violet, short hair, maybe spiky was better term. Pale skin, sharp nose, strong cheekbones, she was very ladylike, like a countess in Russian pictures Hayate had seen when she had still lived on Earth. She looked very calm and professional although her hands were cuffed and Teana pointed a gun at her. She was in charge of situation, at least she acted that way.

"Erika Kalda but Erika is fine," woman offered smiling gently. Hayate blinked, that was a surname in Earth. She should have recognized it sooner.

"Then, Erika, I have heard that you have detailed information about us?"

"I suppose you are right, commander Yagami," the woman replied calmly. "Would you please ask Miss Lanster to lower her gun? As you may have noticed, I have no magical powers."

Hayate's expression didn't change but Teana was clearly surprised. The younger mage wasn't really known unlike Hayate or Nanoha so an outsider shouldn't know her name. Teana looked at her, asking for an order.

"Fate, is she a friend of yours?" Hayate asked instead. If Erika knew about them, she might be an enemy spy but that would just raise a new question: who had sent woman with no magical skills and such a family name? Hayate remembered an Estonian actress with the same name. She had liked the exotic language.

"Yes," the blonde replied looking down. Hayate sighed. She would have to scold Fate later. Or maybe kick the blonde's ass to the city and back while yelling. Giving secret information to an outsider? That was something that a high-ranked officer shouldn't do.

"I see. Then, lower your gun, Teana." The orange haired mage obeyed quickly and took a step backwards. Hayate met Erika's dark eyes.

"I cannot tell you what I have heard nor from where. I hope you understand when I say that my work requires such information," the woman said bluntly. The straightforwardness surprised Hayate because usually people told what she wanted to know or said nothing. This woman, however, wasn't scared of her power.

"And you can't tell me what you do for living, right?"

"It's not hard for you to find out, commander Yagami." the woman smiled.

"Straight to the point, hmm?"

"Indeed. May I go?"

"No. Officer Lanster will take you to the cafeteria. I'll check your background meanwhile. If everything is okay, you are free to go," Hayate replied. Because the woman was honest with her, she decided to return the favour.

"Okay." She looked her escorter who gulped. "Shall we?"

* * *

><p>-x-<p>

* * *

><p>"Fate?" Hayate demanded after the door had closed after Teana and Subaru. The blonde hesitated before looking at her. "Who is she?"<p>

"I… She's a friend," Fate replied after a while. Hayate saw a hurtful look on Nanoha's face but she knew that they had no time for family-drama. Not now.

"How much does she know about our work?"

"A lot."

"Why?"

"I cannot answer." Hayate's eyes caught the quick and unsure glance that was directed at Nanoha. She sighed.

"Nanoha, Signum, Vita, excuse us for a moment. Meanwhile, Signum, look for her information. It's top secret." Hayate ignored the surprised looks Nanoha and Vita shot at her. Kalda woman was dangerous to Fate so giving information to Nanoha was a bad idea. Vita was loyal to the brunette while Signum was to Fate and Hayate. If Hayate said the file was top-secret, Signum wouldn't let others see it. If the information was putting Fate in danger, Signum wouldn't say anything either.

"Yes," Signum said and left the room. Hayate followed her and dragged Fate to the notorious storage room opposite of her office. It was good place to ask for information because of two things: it was soundproof and people tend to get nervous in a small and dim room. Hayate had also had few amazing sessions in the room, too.

Not many things shocked Hayate but what Fate told her was definitely one. She had to act carefully because her head was on the plate, as well as Fate's and maybe the whole squad would receive a punishment. High-ups were total assholes irregularly regularly which meant that they were strict to Hayate but not to the commanders they favoured.

"Okay, Nanoha, would you please inform Teana and Subaru that miss Kalda is free to go but she's not allowed to leave the planet?" Hayate ordered politely before turning her attention back to a certain blonde who had caused more than enough problems to her. Nanoha looked hurt, she knew that Hayate wanted just to send her away but the commander couldn't care less. Fate had specifically requested this so she could do that for the idiotic blonde.

"I hope you have realized that you'll be fired, Fate," Hayate continued and ignored Vita's gasping and Signum's empty look.

* * *

><p><strong>AN2**: No, I couldn't tell about Erika yet. She has still a small role in the next chapter.


End file.
